What to Teach Puppies First — And Why Obedience Can Wait

When a new puppy joins your home, it’s tempting to dive straight into teaching sit, stay, and heel. But research and real-world experience say: slow down. The most important lessons for puppies aren't obedience commands—they’re emotional and social life skills that shape your dog’s entire future.

Let’s break down why.

Puppies Are Not Mini Dogs: Understanding Puppy Development

Puppies aren't just smaller versions of adult dogs. Their brains and nervous systems are still developing, especially in the first 5 months of life. During this sensitive period, their experiences—both good and bad—have a lasting impact on how they see the world. As Scott and Fuller (1965) explained in their groundbreaking research, early puppyhood is a unique developmental window. It’s the time when puppies form their core beliefs: Is the world safe? Can I trust humans? What should I do when I feel unsure or excited?

What you teach—and how you teach it- would shape your puppy's future behaviour, emotional state, and your relationship.

If you’re wondering what to teach a puppy first, this is where the journey begins. Before obedience comes into the picture, puppies need to learn how to feel safe, calm, and curious in a human world. These first lessons aren’t about commands—they focus on emotional stability, trust, and healthy exploration. When these needs are met, learning become s natural.

Puppyhood as a Developmental Journey (0–12 Months)

0–3 Weeks: The Beginning

At this stage, your puppy doesn’t see. Doesn’t hear. They can barely crawl. But even now, important things are happening.

This is the neonatal period, a time when the brain is laying its most basic wiring. Puppies are wrapped in a world of touch, warmth, and scent. They rely on their mother for everything, but if you’re a breeder or a foster, your gentle hands matter too.

Early, positive human touch during these weeks can begin forming the foundation of trust. It’s not about training—it’s about simply being kind. That kindness, paired with the mother’s care, begins to shape the puppy’s very first associations with the world: “Is this place safe? Am I okay here?”

They won’t remember these moments, but their nervous system will.

3–8 Weeks: First Friends and First Feedback

Now the world begins to crack open.

Puppies start to walk, explore, and most importantly, play. This play isn’t just cute; it’s how puppies learn emotional control and communication. When they nip too hard, a littermate yelps and walks away. When they push boundaries, Mom steps in. These are the first lessons in impulse control, frustration, and cooperation.

Puppies need their littermates during this time. Removing a puppy too early—before 7 or 8 weeks—can mean they miss these essential “dog-to-dog” lessons. And no matter how loving we are, humans can’t fully replace that peer feedback.

It’s also when you, the human, can begin to become more than a warm presence. If you’re interacting with a litter, gentle handling paired with new sounds, surfaces, and smells helps prepare their young brain for the wider world. It’s not formal socialization yet, but it’s laying the groundwork.

This is where the idea of resilience begins—through safe play, surprise, and recovery.

8–14 Weeks: The Golden Window

If there’s one stage that every dog guardian should circle, underline, and star—it’s this one.

From 8 to 14 weeks, your puppy’s brain is soaking up the world. This is the critical socialization period where their experiences become part of their emotional blueprint. A man with a beard? Safe. That rattling garbage bin? No big deal. The vet who gives treats before touching my paws? Pretty cool.

Puppies are little sponges during this window. But there’s a catch: this window also closes fast. After 14–16 weeks, new things start to feel more suspicious than exciting. That’s why this is the time to gently introduce your puppy to the real world—but in a way that never overwhelms.

We don’t want to teach them to “obey” here. We want to teach them to explore, recover, and trust.

Take them on quiet walks where they can sniff and notice things. Let them meet calm dogs and kind strangers. Let them look at a skateboard before it zooms by, not chase it. Give them chances to hear sounds, feel textures, and discover that novelty doesn’t have to be scary.

And remember: every new thing should be followed by something good. A treat. A cuddle. A game.

This is also the perfect time to begin gentle handling—touching ears, paws, tails—with lots of rewards. You’re not just preparing them for the vet; you’re teaching them that being touched means connection, not discomfort.

Social confidence is built here. And confidence is what creates cooperation down the road.

14–24 Weeks: Curiosity Meets Caution

By this age, your puppy is growing fast—longer legs, sharper teeth, bolder attitude. They look more “dog” than baby now, and many families feel a shift: the puppy who once followed closely now runs ahead, sniffs everything, and sometimes ignores you entirely. Don’t worry. That’s development, not disobedience.

This stage—sometimes called the juvenile period—is full of contrasts. Your puppy might seem brave one day and skittish the next. They may test boundaries, push for independence, or “forget” things they knew last week. But underneath it all, their brain is still building the foundation for emotional balance and impulse control.

One important change happening now:

Your puppy may go through a “fear period”—a stretch of days or weeks where they suddenly act unsure of things that never bothered them before.

A garden hose. A stranger in a hat. The vacuum. This is normal. It's not regression—it's neurological. Their brain is learning to assess risk, and sometimes it overcorrects.

Your job here is not to push—it’s to guide.

Let them observe. Let them retreat and try again later. Offer calm praise and treats when they choose to re-approach. The key is to show them that the world is still safe, even when it looks a little different.

What to Practice During the Juvenile Period

This isn’t the time for polished obedience or high expectations—but it’s a golden time to start laying the skills behind the skills: focus, flexibility, frustration tolerance, and voluntary engagement.

Here are some meaningful things to teach during this stage:

1. Pattern and Reset Games

Use predictable, reward-based patterns to build security and rhythm.

• Treat Toss & Return: Toss a treat away from you, mark (use the same cue to mark the wanted behaviour, like "yes" or use a clicker) when the pup turns back to you, reward near your feet. It builds soft recall habits.

• 1-2-3 Pattern Game (inspired by Leslie McDevitt): Count out loud “1... 2... 3,” and drop a treat after “3.” Builds anticipation, calmness, and focus.

2. Stationing or Mat Work (Calm Place, Not Command)

Teach your pup to settle on a mat, bed, or blanket—not with pressure, but with positive reinforcement.

Start with just placing a treat on the mat for exploring it. Eventually, reward calm sitting or lying down. Let it become a “safe zone” for them, not a place they’re sent to.

This builds self-regulation, which obedience can’t fake.

3. Hand Touch (Targeting Your Hand with Their Nose)

This is the Swiss army knife of early training. It teaches orientation to you, builds movement cues, and is easy for puppies to succeed at.

• Extend your hand like a target.

• Mark (yes!) when your puppy bumps it with their nose.

• Reward and celebrate—build fluency gradually.

4. Casual Recalls

Instead of drilling “COME,” make returning to you a habit worth repeating.

• Call with happy voice when the pup is only a few feet away.

• Toss a treat when they reach you and release them again.

• Use games like “chase me and I’ll chase you” to build joyful associations.

5. Permission and Pause Games

This age is a great time to start introducing basic impulse control without frustration.

• Hold a treat in your fist. When your puppy backs off, mark and give it.

• Ask for “pause” before going through doors or getting meals—but keep it short and light.

These aren’t tests. They’re conversations that build communication.

Troubleshooting the 4–6 Month Stage

“My puppy is suddenly scared of weird things.”

→ You’ve hit a fear period. Don’t avoid everything, but don’t push either. Let them approach on their own terms. Sit down with them and observe together. Bring treats. Let novelty stay positive.

“My dog is ignoring cues he used to know.”

→ Expect this. Think of it as temporary static. Lower your expectations, go back to familiar games, and build fluency again in low-distraction spaces. Adolescence is coming—connection now will help later.

“My dog is pulling like crazy on leash.”

→ Rather than wrestling with the leash, shift to engagement games. Toss treats forward on walks to encourage following. Teach “let’s go” with direction changes. Use parks for sniff walks, not drills.

“My dog bites harder now—what happened to the soft puppy?”

→ Teething and frustration can spike during this time. Redirect biting to tug toys. Provide frozen chews. Avoid rough handling or punishment, which can create tension or shutdown.

Your puppy doesn’t need to be “obedient” at this stage—they need to feel seen, supported, and guided. Every small game you play now, every moment you choose connection over correction, becomes the foundation for a calm, trusting relationship that lasts for years.